Today's Fashions Really Suck

Today I thought would be a good day to buy some new clothes. Most everything I have is worn out and almost threadbare. It might be because I really don't like to shop for clothes. The plan was to go to JC Penny and check things out there. I did not set my expectations too high on finding anything I really liked. Just maybe a couple tops, a pair of jeans, or shorts.
With me and my low expectations, I start wandering around the store looking at this and that. There were several tops I liked but every size they had was small or medium. In today's world a women' s size small would probably fit my 8 year old granddaughter's.
Ok, so this is starting to tick me off a bit. "Leave the store now!" said one of the voices in my head. Ignoring the warning, I continue on my quest. It seemed like every they had was in bright pink, lemon lime, orange orange and so on. I don't think I want to look like an Easter egg this spring. I just want something simple in normal colors. I don't like the empire waist type shirts either. Anyone who has big boobs knows that seam is suppose to be under your boobs, not smack dab through the middle. Oh and since we're on the subject of boobs, I prefer mine to be inside my shirt. It's hard to find anything that keeps the girls from showing off. No luck finding tops here. Then I went over to check out the jeans. Bad idea. The good part was that most of them were on sale at a decent price. The bad part is that some fashion genius decided that women should wear low rider jeans now. Only a small percentage of young girls and women actually look good in them. The rest of us end up with muffin tops and the crack of our ass's exposed. I prefer the crack of my ass to be covered up. I could go on and on about low rider jeans but I won't. (in my day they were called hip huggers)
The thought of trying on a million pair of jeans to find one pair that would fit was not what I wanted to do at this point. Now I knew I wasn't going to find anything today. It was time to leave the store now.